Happy Memorial Day!

What an irony of words. Have a happy Memorial Day? Happy times of thinking of those who have sacrificed their lives, their bodies, their minds for our freedom that people take advantage of daily? Hmmm...Is it just me or does it seem weird that people take this weekend to have BBQs and parties and get drunk and all....Or is it nice that we can be optimistic and celebrate even the worst of times? I have no clue. I'm actually in one of my thinking days though. We're BBQing ribs in my crock pot today, LoL.
It's raining buckets which is fantastic! My flower bed is parched! No matter how much or how often I water it, the dirt is dry always. Must be because I'm the first person to touch it in 10 years. Hmm...Well my husband bought me all kinds of gardening tools and helped me finish the weeding on it. I have since planted my hollyhocks and two pretty flowers that I forgot the names of already, LoL. But they're at least gorgeous! I also felt ambitious and planted two strawberry plants as well but in another corner of the area. One is already starting to grow berries, Yay! I'm soo getting more plants! I adore this whole planting things and reaping yummy food! Haha.
My husband gets today off so we're planning on heading up to Sears in Minot to pick up our new BBQ grill that my dad bought. Man craves meat burnt from an artificial fire so he goes and buys a BBQ grill. Hmm...Men...LoL. That's fine, it means no cooking on my part. I can work with that one, Lol!
Two more weeks until Abel goes to Minneapolis for another session of class for the railroad. Actually this time he is taking his big conductor test. He's been studying and taking practice tests online and has been doing well so far on those so I pray he passes this big one. He's going to be gone for our anniversary so I and Hannah are taking off one weekend to go see him and spend a few days with him. Mall of America here we come! LoL. And I'm hoping I can meet the infamous Gucci Mama herself finally!

Speaking of my fairy godmother and angel in disguise....




What in the world is my daughter doing you ask? Well Stephanie generously donated some of her maternity clothes to my pregnancy and lack of clothes case. But instead of getting one package in the mail (that I hadn't been expecting so soon!) we received two! One was for Hannah herself with a beautiful card (that she has in her room and enjoys me reading at least twice a day) a super adorable bathing suit (that she insisted on wearing all stinking day! LoL) and a care bear and Elmo doll (that both have kicked out our favorite dolly in bed). Elmo goes everywhere with us now and she was super excited to have gotten goodies for her very own! She also got some chalk and now spends everyday outside while mommy is gardening she draws! Which I adore greatly because before she enjoyed running off on me and I never really got to garden. I hope the picture shows her excitement as it was right after she got the gifts. I on the other hand won't be modeling the beautiful clothes just yet. I'm going through a "OMG my butt is HUGE!" stage of life and the clothes are too gorgeous to wear around the house just yet, LoL. I read in one of the many books of pregnancy that pregnant women should never ever look in a mirror. I hit that stage and should have listened....
So a huge thank you to miss Stephanie! We won't go into details about how I sobbed while reading your card and then have placed it in a frame above my computer desk and tear up every time I glance at it. But the clothes are absolutely beautiful, fit perfectly and minus the fat a** I'm dragging behind me, they actually are the first pieces of clothes to look decent on me. LoL. Who would've guessed...
To everyone else, thank you for reading my blabbering nonsense all the time and I hope you've had a great weekend and continue enjoying this extra day off! Here's to frying dead pieces of meat slobbered with BBQ sauce and enjoying time with friends and family! Lots of love!
*Beckie*

Weed Nazi!

Ugh so Sassy Pants, you have a standing ovation from me girl! Well, no I'm not really standing but it's the thought that counts and girl, this thought is huge! LoL.
So, Beckie was bored today. Hubby left to do his "pool duty" as they refer to it on the rail. He went to Portal, Canada and comes back tomorrow. Typical run, not a biggie. So my father had bought these flowers and wanted me to plant them. Today was beautiful and Hannah has been a pill so I figured sure why not let's all go outside for the day and I'll do some planting finally. Ugh. Famous last words...
I will say thank God for small blessings. I'm terrified of bees. I can handle an IV and giving birth but one thought of a bee sting terrifies me, go figure. So I only saw two bees and it was sticking around one of my strawberry plants so I walked away and that was it. Thank you God. But the 4 hours of weed pulling just about killed me. I hate weeds. I spent 4 hours outside and when I had to quit to make dinner, I felt so good! I was like heck yeah, I rock at this and I love gardening and I can't wait to do this more often and yaaay. I was all kinds of making verbal love to myself. Until I stood up and REALLY took in what I did. Nothing. Seriously. It looks like I did nothing. The area I worked on isn't huge but then again it hasn't been touched in over 11 years. The weeds were so bad and twisted around the couple of Tiger Lillies that have been there since before we moved here and the grass outside of the little boundary bricks had grown over and actually covered my bricks! It took me four hours but I have a nice spot completely weed free and have uncovered a good amount of my bricks again. I just must be the slowest gardener in the world. I felt so good until I really surveyed my handiwork. Can I use the excuse that this is my first time gardening ever? LoL.
I have a nice patch out in back of the house that is going to be used for my veggie garden too. We're planting Onions, Cucumbers, Green Peppers, Tomatoes, Chili Peppers, Green Beans, and Lettuce out there. And then I have a rhubarb bush and a few strawberry and raspberry plants as well. I'm very excited. I'm planning on making my own baby food with this one. Only because I don't want to spend sooo much money on baby food when I can just mush up whatever we're eating. So that's what I'm doing with most of my veggies and fruits. Yay me, LoL. Susie freaking homemaker after all.
I got to go out the other night. A friend was having a birthday and one of the bars was having a huge Luai and DJ so of course the only thing to do in a small town? Hit the bars! My favorite thing about being pregnant? Putting on a skin tight shirt that flaunts the belly and walking into a bar to order a shirley temple, Haha! I love people staring at me for that one reason. Like it's wrong for a pregnant lady to go into a bar to have a good time. Hey, someone has to be the designated driver right? Anyways, so Abel came along and we got to go out for a few hours which was nice. Usually it's me and a few girlfriends or just him and his boys. Not ever us both. So we got to hang out with a bunch of our friends and I got to be one of two Designated Drivers and watch how funny (and stupid) drunk people can be. I was very proud of myself as well. After the bars closed down at 1am, we went to the birthday girls house to finish out our night. One girl who was very intoxicated started hitting on Abel and I didn't get my hackles up and freak out like I always threaten I would. I just laughed it off and told everyone around me when they became worried, "ehh it's okay, I know who my man is coming home with tonight". Abel said he was pretty impressed. I figure it's time to drop the high school crap and start acting like an adult right? LoL. Well...Most days, haha!!
So it wasn't the most amazing and glamorous night out but it was a night out and I had loads of fun.
A co-worker of Abel's passed away this week. Just a few days ago actually. It's been a trying time for me for some reason. I knew of the guy but didn't know the guy you know what I mean? I know his wife and can't stand her. I can be quite the snob when it comes to people in this town, you will soon find out btw...Anyways, the guy hung himself because for over a year he's been battling depression and his wife has been running around on him. I get so mad when I hear about railroad wives running around on their husbands. Seriously what is the difficult part of staying faithful like you vowed you would? It's my shining "society sucks" moment I apologize. Railroaders are gone for 2 days. Not even whole days mind you, but two days each time they make a run to Portal. And they don't go that often. most of the time they are stuck here in town doing yard work or whatever. So forgive me but where is the difficult part in being faithful? I tell Abel all the time, it's like a mini vacay for me. I adore him and love him and can be quite clingy but seriously? I enjoy sleeping in a full size bed all by myself sometimes. It can be nice every once in awhile, LoL. That and I can watch any movie I want, play the Xbox and skip out on doing chores for a day. So I look at it with a different view I guess. It just frustrates me to all get up why women in this town, and not just limited to this town mind you, but women can be so...grrr. You know? Abel and I talked about it and he knows he never has to worry about me and trust. Well, I told him that if I run into a very desperate Vin Diesel or Matthew Perry, we may have issues, LoL. but the chances of that actually happening...But I just feel horrid because what happened to this guy. I just feel bad....
Anyways to get off my pedastool now and quit my whining and griping about useless stuff...I'm posting pics of my pitiful flower bed. I still feel slightly good about how I did. I'll post another few when I finish. These can be counted as my "before" pics, haha.
Anyways, I hope you all are doing well! I get to go boil some water as our water heater went out and the plumber isn't coming until tomorrow and as I was playing in the dirt today, I should clean up. LoL. So have a good evening everyone! And I'll blog again another day!

*Beckie*

~~My little flower corner. You can actually see the brick boundary again!~~



~~From afar...Doesn't look great...~~

It Could Have Been Worse...

Well ladies, I thought my day was going great as it was when I ended that post yesterday. Turns out it only got better! LoL. At least I have my sense of humor.
So yesterday shortly after that post I felt like things were only getting worse and as I'd been dealing with contractions for 24 hours, I probably should call it quits with my stubborn pride and hit the ER. It's a good thing I did as my Dr was disappointed that I didn't go in sooner. Yes it was pre-term labor and yes they were admitting me and yes I bawled like a baby. Abel got to stay with me for 2 hours until he absolutely had to take off for work out of town. He was freaked out as it was so I'm glad he didn't call in or something. We had an ultrasound done and Nacio is fine. Very fine thank God. And I got lucky to have the start of a UTI which was just an added bonus. Yay me...So I got admitted and began freaking out because not only was I stabbed 8 time in order to get an IV but I was in the beginning of an anxiety attack. I asked for a few minutes alone and went to the bathroom and sobbed and began repeating the only thought I could think of at that moment: God only gives you what you can handle...That was my mantra all night and surprisingly helped me out a lot. Hannah stayed with my dad which worried me as I know Hannah can be a lot to handle and dad has COPD and can't do much, hence why we live with him. I didn't need him to over exert himself and join me in the hospital too you know? And the fact that last night was only the 3rd time in Hannah's life that I wasn't with her overnight. I missed her so much and when dad called to let her tell me night-night, I lost it. I tear up now thinking about it.
I'm so thankful that this pregnancy is going as well as it is and pray that this was the last time I deal with this. Last night made me realize for the first time that yes, I really can't do this again. This must be my last bout with pregnancy. Miscarriages suck and take so much from you. I've had 3 and healed so I thought I was pretty tough by now. I'm not.
Last night I thought of Stephanie. Miss Gucci Mama. What she went through with Ella her miracle baby born super early. It made me sad because it's one thing to sit on my end of the computer, read what she was going through and pray for her. I didn't have a clue what she was going through and I didn't fully understand. Last night, sitting in that hospital room made me feel like I was slacking. I chose between my children and felt so broken hearted and it is probably just the hormones because Hannah was fine, it was only one night and I'm home now, but I just hurt a little still you know? I have a whole new found respect and a little bit of understanding for her now though. She was in for a few weeks and went through certainly more than I did but I got to walk half an inch in her shoes and didn't like it one bit. Now I just an truly amazed at the strength of people that I thought I was amazed with before. And I realize that maybe one day, slowly as it's taking me, I'm going to be stronger as a person. Maybe...
Now I'm praying and hoping that we can make it 10 more weeks. I gotta get to 35 weeks Dr says. 25 weeks is too soon to be having these issues. So begins the new countdown :) 9 1/2 more weeks if we wanna get technical about it. A gallon of water a day and lots of antibiotics and probably bi-weekly appointments again.
I lost my train of thought now...And Hannah is waking up from her nap and as I haven't seen her since I got home I think this is where I'll end it. I'm done with the contractions thanks to the lovely meds and fluids and all. I'm doing much better now that I'm home and I'm hoping God doesn't test me much more during this time. I broke down rather easily last night, I don't think I could do it again.
Stephanie has a March of Dimes donation going on on her page, please go check out her latest blog and read it and donate! It's super important!! If you don't know who Stephanie is (Gucci Mama) She's on my blogs that I read and my followers. I'm not good with links btw...Oh and let her know what a dynamite person she is! God couldn't have made a stronger and more amazing person. And a late Happy Mothers Day to everyone if I forgot to mention that yesterday!! Lots of love to you all!!!

Happy Mother's Day!!

All my friends, you are amazing mother's hence what drew me to your blogs and your friendship. It comforts me that you don't live a 100% life or brag of being the perfect mother. Thank you oh so much for that! Let's say I have a few of those people in my life as it is, LoL.
So I hope your day is magnificent. Mine is less that perfect...Well very less than perfect but I'm content so it's not a bother. I have a very cranky and whiny two year old that finally is napping on the couch. And a sick husband who has been sleeping for the past two hours...Wasn't I supposed to be the one allowed to lay in bed alone all day??? I think we messed this day up a little...And the son residing in my belly? Is once again wanting out early. Yes, contractions for the past 24 hours. It is lovely let me tell you what. I'm guzzling water just to cover that base before rushing off to the ER for a $1500 bill that I really don't need. And I look at this as practice for the future. If I get used to the pain now it may not hurt as bad later, LoL. Sick way of thinking but it works, haha.
Hubby and I went out last night to go see Fast & Furious the movie. It was a great movie and something we both love watching. But why may I ask, is a movie about cars and racing and action allowed to include at least two scenes of lesbian orgies??? Watching women in groups of 3 or more making out and grabbing each other just isn't my thing, pardon me. And my husband made me ever so proud when he turned to me and said well since we're in the middle of worthless garbage, I'm going to the bathroom. Oh thank you for not enjoying it while drooling. Ugh. Other than that it was great! I love cars and hubby and I enjoy imports and racing. LoL. I just don't enjoy getting under the hood and getting dirty. Oh well.
Afterwards we went to the bar so Abel and I could have a few minutes of grown up time before heading off back home. I actually enjoyed turning heads, haha. I would stare if I saw a 6 month pregnant woman walk into a bar and order a Shirley Temple. It was fun and I enjoyed myself.
So ladies, I hope you have a glorious day, this is YOUR day as you know. I had plans of this being longer but I want to go lay down and take a Tylenol (shhh don't tell my doctor) Love to you all!!!!!

Ugh!

Thank you swine flu! I adore you! NOT!! So my trip to California that I was supposed to be happily going on, has been canceled. Too many outbreaks where my mother lives and it would put too much risk for the baby to catch it and although there haven't been any deaths (minus the one Mexican toddler who came to Texas for care) I still don't feel like putting Hannah in that situation either. Oh but it makes me ever so sad! I had so much I was looking forward to and the fact that my daughter hasn't seen my mother in over two years was the main thing. I want my daughter to have a decent relationship with my mom but how can she when we never see each other?? I hate living so far away from family. Abel's family all live in the Fresno area of California, mine live near Palm Springs and then our friends all live in Montana, back in Libby. When I let it get to me, it is quite depressing....
So now I'm in the blahs lately with nothing much to do. Our town held one of it's bi-annual City Wide Yard Sales yesterday. Everyone who wants to have a yard sale gives the city $5 and the city prints out a map of the city and highlights their house. And beginning at 9am everyone goes nuts trying to hit all the houses they can first, haha. I left Hannah here with my father and I went with a friend of mine and her 8 month old daughter who was on her best behavior. I spent a total of $80 and got like 13 bags of clothes for Hannah, a few clothes for Ignacio and two toys for him as well. There are so many people here that are clothes snobs. I'm sorry but if I just bought my daughter her entire summer wardrobe for $80 and they happen to also be name brand, I think I'm doing fabulous! A friend of my dads told him that she never clothes her grandchildren in used clothes, she's too good for that! 'scuuuuse me!
So I have Hannah completely outfitted for summertime and it's a relief on me! Yes I spent so much money but I did very well. For some reason no one around here has baby boys so there were hardly any baby boy clothes but I'll deal with it. I hit one house and this lady had nothing but sets of clothes. No separates. She buys all her stuff on the internet in sets so I got super lucky and basically bought an entire table worth of stuff from her. Hannah even scored a few pajama sets! And I even managed to find a maternity dress for this awful wedding I have to attend in August. 5 days before my due date. Down at our city "lake". I'm going to be such a b*&^% when that hits. August here is humid and hot and nasty and I'm going to be down near the water for over an hour sitting my fat butt there for someone who I hate...OMG! Why am I even going!?!? LoL. Gotta be nice, gotta be nice...In the process if meeting new friends and rekindling old friendships from high school, this is one of the girls who I had a BIG problem with in high school who thinks we are cool now...Gotta be nice, gotta be nice...Anyways, I scored a maternity shirt and got Abel a shirt as well. So it was a good day.
I'm sitting down finally, with a little over 3 months to go, trying to figure out what all I need for Ignacio. I can't quite actually get to the sitting down and doing the work part but it's nice thinking about it. LoL. Did any of you actually use a stroller? I can't figure out if I want to get one of the stroller and car seat combos, just a car seat or invest in a car seat and a double stroller. I'm having Ignacio in August, doubt I'll be taking him for a walk anytime before winter hits (which snow falls usually at the end of September). I just don't know what to do but really can't afford to waste money. Any hints or helpful ideas??? LOL.
Ugh so anyways, my dishes are doing themselves in the dishwasher and I'm going to wake up Hannah to go to the park with some friends. I met and talked to her soon to be daycare provider and am really excited for September to roll around. It sounds horrible I know, here I am a stay at home mommy and trying to dump my kid off on daycare. But Head Start is fully booked so far so they don't think they can get Hannah in on September and Hannah is in dire need of some kid time. She is definitely an only child as hard as we tried to not make her one but if she doesn't get near kids her own age, she'll be screwed for later. So I figure one day a week for 3 hours or so, she'll get some good kid time in and yet not be gone too long. And yes, with the new baby here, it will help me out to have sort of a break. I know, I am a huge slacker, no words for it. I have guilt trips about it don't worry...
Anywho I should get going. I need to get on here more often and post updates for everyone. I'm such a slacker on that too. I hope everyone's weekend went well and that you are all doing fabulous! Lots of love to you all!!

*Beckie*