Monday, March 8, 2010

Weight Upon The Heart

I did it. Finally. I was encouraged by fellow blogger MckMama to sponsor a child through Compassion International. And I am so glad i did. I prayed about it for a few days. There are just so many children out there who need a sponsor and I didn't want to be rash about it. God led me to Ana. She is from Mexico and is 11 years old. Her birthday is the same as my husband's-two weeks away :) Right in time for her birthday, God has led her sponsor to her :)

I know I don't proclaim it enough, but I am a very proud Christian. I'm not a hypocrite and I don't claim to be perfect-Only Jesus is perfect. I am very much a sinner and sin every day. Every minute really. But Jesus died upon that cross and allowed me to be good enough for Him. Sin and all.

I have also decided that one day, not now, not next month or anything like that, but one day, I will be doing mission work. Out of all my goals and dreams in life, that is the one still alive. I want to travel somewhere and I want to do. Whatever it is, I want to do for others. I want to build homes, schools or teach others about Christ. I want to be humbled and I want my pride to be squashed. And I want to do hard work for others and help them in any and all ways that I can.

I get excited for mail. I'm very excitable like that. But I have never looked forward to receiving a letter so much, like I am right now, waiting for Ana's. I'm praying and thinking of her constantly and hoping that within the month, her letter comes. It's an awesome feeling knowing that you are helping someone with so little. I want to talk to Abel and choose another child to sponsor as well. I look at all the petty things we buy within the month and I am ashamed. Abel's job has been a blessing beyond comprehension. But it has also been a curse. So I'm trying now to save what I can, to buy nothing wasteful and pay off our bills and debts. And now to give back to others who need it.

It's such a sad thought that people can live off of $38 a month isn't it? Women in Kenya pay $6 a month for rent in a shanty. The photos on MckMama's blog will bring tears to your eyes. But amongst the poor is such beauty and such happiness. They are rich you see. Not rich in money but rich in heart. It's amazing and I can't put into words what I'm thinking and feeling. I can't tell you as beautifully as MckMama does. You really need to visit her blog and go backwards and check out her past blogs. She and her husband were chosen to go to Kenya. And that is where they are now. Her blog is one of my favorites. Because of the trials that her and her husband have gone through, yet as they go through each one, they keep their head high praising God. I wish I could be there. I wish I could do as God says and praise Him, even through the bad times.

I don't mean to preach here, this is all on my heart and I needed to get it off. I applied for the Fall 2010 bloggers trip to central America through Compassion. I think it would be an awesome experience, not just for myself or the people down there, but for my readers as well :) So pray that I might have a chance at this trip, and if not this one, one in the future. And take a look at MckMama's blog. Maybe even be daring enough to check out, $38 a month really isn't that much when you think of all it can do someone who lives with nothing.


Sassy Pants Freckle Face said...

Rock you heart! And Blessed is a woman who is so strong in her resolve and faith,I am so touched and proun=d of you! all my love!

Justine said...

Beckie, what a beautiful thing you're doing for little Ana!!! I think just this little thing is going to bring you much joy... probably more than you'll bring to her if you know what I mean.

But I'm sooooooooooo confused. In one post you say you're Jewish, in another (this one) you say you're Christian. Set me straight, please!

Justine :o )

Krystyn said...

WTG! I've sponsored a child before in Nicaragua. I need to redo it. That's so awesome of you.

And, you should definitely go on a mission trip. It is life changing. I went to Nicaragua, and I hope that those people and images never leave my heart.